How do i handle my daughter?
Topic: My homework assignment book
June 19, 2019 / By Laudine Question:
She is 11 and is failing two of her classes. she is SO forgetful. Finishes her homework but forgets to turn it in. Every answer she has for us is "i forgot" or "i don't know". had meeting w/teacher & she should be passing in all classes. is she wanting negative attention? she says no. We've punished & talked all we can to her about it. Could she have ADD? she's not hyperactive. We are trying so hard to help her...but what else can we do? She has no sense of urgency to improve...but she's a happy child.
Also found her desk at school to be unorganized. We've helped her put everything in folders & talked to her teacher. We help her a lot at home. Every night it's a discussion about her school work & she just seems like it's not a big deal.
Best Answers: How do i handle my daughter?
Jetta | 2 days ago
My son has always been like this from the homework (I forgot) to the disorganized desk, locker, room, his car, his appearance and it goes on. From an early age he was like this and nothing seemed to work, I came to the understanding this is who he is (Gotta love him, he's unique). On the up side he is now graduating and he has improved but it takes a lot of reminders and lots of "I know you can do it, please try ". Punishments rarely work, it just doesn't seem to bother them for some reason.
If you believe it's something with a label you should have her evaluated (son was also tested, didn't find anything though). Get involved in her school work and make a mental note or ask if there is anything due tomorrow, remind her in the morning to hand it in. You could also make sure she has a journal or homework book and get the teacher to sign it when she hands assignments in, check it or question her if she handed it in.
Remember, she's just a kid and perhaps has a lot going on and may honestly forget. She just needs a little help for now and eventually she'll get in the habit of remembering assignments on her own. Good luck.
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Originally Answered: How can I handle this rejection?
Ted, rejection hurts always and most of us got rejected at some point and others did the rejecting...
She probably likes you as a friend but she was not interested in a romantic relationship with you..and I get it..that made you feel bad about yourself and you lost some self esteem..but all it means is that this particular girl means is ''I like you but I don't feel a romantic connection with you'' and that happens..we feel sparks for someone and are attracted to someone but that person does not have the same feelings..or they feel they like us but it's not love. It is better she told you this..she was not nasty about it but if she sees you as a pal and not as someone she wants to date ..that doesn['t mean that other girls don't like you and would not want to go on a date with you...you had no real relationship with this girl..and it still hurts to be rejected I understand that but it hurts even more if you had been in a relationship with someone and then get dumped..so I believe even if you cried that night and it's ok to show emotions even as a guy, that's fine..if you cared a lot about her, then most girls prefer a guy to have emotions than a guy who never shows any...so just accept what happened but don't let this get you down...some things are not meant to be and just because she likes you just as a pal...that may be a good thing because most likely she was never the girl intended for you..the one who is right for you is out there somewhere so she exists, and you have to not give up looking for her...and when you meet a girl whom you are interested in..smile at her..study her body language and her facial expression..don't be shy...if she smiles back then walk up to her and start a casual conversation..and maybe you find you have things in common..become friends and you start to get to know each other better ..then you will feel if the spark is mutual if you get to know a person better...you find out if you have similar goals or dreams about the future..and if there is mutual attraction as well as mutal respect and trust and you can talk to each other at ease..about anything and everything that's important..then you find out if you met your soulmate..she is out there somewhere for sure and she is looking for you..so you have to socialize and not lose self esteem because there is no reason to feel that...another girl will say ''yes' and then the attraction will be mutual in this case you liked her and she liked you..but not as a boyfriend..just as a pal..so if she had lied to you and lead you on that would have been worse..she did not reject you on purpose but if someone does not feel a romantic connection they should not lie about it and waste someone's time...you will perhaps find some girl attracted to you and you like her well enough but if you are not attracted to her then you will not want a romantic relationship and you would tell her that you like her as a friend..then she would feel like you do now..but I have dated and been in relationships and been dumped later..that hurts even more..but we get over it,,,and I also have rejected someone at some point...and I am sure this person is glad about it now, because he found someone much more suitable for him...as will you!...Most of us went through having been rejected or something similar...and it feels bad, it can hurt for some time..you need to go out..focus on a hobby, join a club...a hobby or a sports club..meet new people..maybe you meet the right girl that way..x
Well I would talk to the doctor and make sure that it isn't a condition...like ADD or ADHD.
Is she getting enough sleep?
Is she being fed good healthy nutritous food?
Does she have a structured routine (it's harder to forget a habit)?
If the answers to all these questions is yes...then maybe we're talking about a behavioral problem...in which case you need to make the situation urgent. It's simple "cause and effect" ...
No homework = no playtime
Failing school = stay behind a grade
Messy desk = no dessert
No screaming or punishing or drama...just very simple cause and effect...she may learn that some things are important by association if nothing else...
You can also use charts to help her learn her routine until it's part of her daily life.
Organization takes work and consistency and it starts with you.
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Is the work overwhelming her?
Are things moving too fast?
Maybe she needs extra help with notes and outlining?
I would see where the teacher can help and have her come up with some ideas too. Maybe she can try and write notes and the teacher can add key facts to those notes that she may have missed.
Then at home just check her homework and her bag daily to make sure she is doing the work.
With her failing grades and not knowing the answers this maybe why she is so unorganized.... Maybe get her new binders, 3 hole paper, and ask her to help you understand what shes doing, and problem solve what needs to be done to clean it up.
If she isn't getting anywhere, suggest that she may have to take summer school or stay back a year.
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Well some people don't care. I have a brother in law much like like that. What my mom did when I was kid she had me bring a report every week filled out by teachers say what my grade what, how I acted and what home work I turned in. I also had to a day plainer and that I had to show what home was do on what night from what class. If I missed anything of things I was fined or grouned. The all might dollar has always been big in my world so my mom would pay me for a and b and take money a way for anything less.
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Hi. My daughter went through the same thing and she did have ADD without Hyperactivity (that is ADHD). You need to get her tested. ADD is the inability to stay on task/stay focused/stay organized.
Many middleschools now have an agenda which is a bound book that outlines all the days of the week for the calendar year. It is to be used everyday by the child and that is where she has to write down what she has for homework. Secondly, at home, we got my daughter binders and then put folders in the binder. As soon as homeowork was done, it went into one side of the folder. Worksheets and handouts went in the pocket that needed to come home; in addition to permission slips and things the parent needs to see. It was my responsibility to work with her teachers to make sure that long term projects were remembered since that is difficult for children with ADD to remember long term assignements.
My daughter is also on medication and she is now a junior. She still has difficulty, but is doing much better. She has a "resource" teacher in school whom she sees once a day. The teacher makes sure that she's not struggling, communicates for her with her teachers and is basically her ally in school. It is part of her PPT/IEP which is Parent/Pupil/Teacher Individualized Educational Plan and her plan is looked at and revised 2 times a year.
It cannot hurt to have your daughter tested. The test is simple, painless and if she does have ADD will do a lot to restore your (and her) sanity. Also her teachers will come to have a different opinion of her than the one they are developing now.
It drives me crazy when a teacher says "she should be passing" and then does nothing to find out why she may not be. It's considered a child being lazy or not caring, which blows my mind. Granted teachers have a lot to deal with, but the lack of proactive work with struggling students drives me nuts. I actually had one teacher tell me that she had 65 kids and didn't have time to give individualized attention to my daughter. I had that teacher removed. (Turns out I wasn't the only one complaining, but you get my drift).
Good luck and speak to your daughter guidance counselor.
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Originally Answered: How do you handle being called a slut?
Ignore him. He was just being a real life troll. Giving any kind of reaction would just feed his trolling. As long as your cheeks weren't hanging out of your shorts, and you weren't showcasing any cleavage, what you were wearing sounds fine.