Groom doesn't seem to care about wedding?
Topic: The sisters brothers movie rights cost
June 19, 2019 / By Maryanne Question:
My fiance and I are to be married next spring. I was hoping to get a guest list together so I could start budgeting food costs, invitation costs, etc.
I have asked my fiance to give me names of people he would like to invite to the wedding so I can get started on budgeting. He is completely uninterested. I have tried to get my family (who is paying for the wedding) and his sister (an attendant) to talk to him about why it is important to get a guest list together and to budget early, but he still doesn't seem to care. He is so uninterested in doing any wedding details that he still hasn't asked his brother to be his best man yet, and we've been engaged for five months! He keeps telling me we have "plenty of time."
Sometimes I wonder why he proposed at all.
Is this normal for grooms? Can I expect him to be this unenthusiatic for the entire wedding process? How do I deal with him not giving me a guest list?
Thanks in advance.
I sincerely doubt there is someone else. He isn't really that sort of person, and his mother used to cheat on his dad, and it's clear that it really shook him up. Honesty seems to be the most important thing to him in our relationship. He can be BRUTALLY honest sometimes.
Best Answers: Groom doesn't seem to care about wedding?
Lally | 4 days ago
Don't worry, luv, your problem is far from abnormal. A man builds up all his adrenaline and energy to propose, and then once the wedding date is set, he can tend to lose momentum. I think it's a mixture of things that is causing your fiance's sudden wedding apathy.
First of all, you say your wedding is next spring. Well, that is still a whole year off, and- not to generalize here, but- men tend to sort of procrastinate. They don't see the need to plan things out a whole year in advance, not even weddings. To him, the wedding is ages away, and he's having a hard time mustering up enthusiasm for planning any details for something so far off his current radar screen. He is right to tell you that you have "plenty of time," because you really do, but he also has to understand that you're very excited, as well as very organized. My advice to you would be to do the preliminary planning yourself, and then have him pitch in as the date draws closer. Sometime after New Year's 2010, he'll definitely start getting it in gear. I'm getting married in under 5 months, and my fiance still thinks we have all the time in the world!! You work on the rough draft guest list, the preliminary budget, the early planning details, etc. and bring him in for the finalization of everything. And don't worry if he hasn't asked his bro to be best man yet- it's his brother, what's he going to say, "No?"
Secondly, marriage is a very big step for the two of you, but to a man it can sometimes signal the end of his single life, rather than a delightful new beginning. Sure, he loves you and wants to marry you, but he's also really scared of what the future holds. You may be too, but- once again, sorry to generalize- usually, women plan and dream of their wedding day for years before it actually happens, and to them a wedding is the happiest day of their lives. Men tend to have extremely adverse reactions to weddings, even if they truly are in love and really do want to marry. It's normal for a guy to get a little freaked out and turned off by the whole wedding planning process, especially if their fiancee talks about wedding, wedding, wedding all the time from the second they get engaged. I would suggest that you try to take breaks from the wedding talk and keep having conversations about other subjects (work, movies, etc.) It's so exciting, I know, to plan a wedding, but it will help you and your fiance out a lot more if you keep your pre-engagement interests and hobbies going still too. Maybe you and your fiance can pick a day of every week to be the designated "wedding talk" night, where you go over anything you want to discuss about the wedding. Not only will it keep your man from being overloaded, but it will also make it more of a fun, exciting treat for you too, and you won't get burned out by it all. Congrats!
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Originally Answered: How to groom a dog?
Puppy cut doesn't mean anything. It just means one length all over, and that can mean different lengths. All the groomers I've worked with hate the term puppy cut.
You can't groom a small dog on the floor like that. How do you expect to properly see what you are doing and control the dog? The dog will think you are playing and try to jump around or wander off, and you'll kill your back.
You don't need to buy a grooming table, but you do need to buy a grooming arm (the upright metal piece that clamps onto a table, where you attach the restraint that goes around the dog's neck) and clamp it onto a table you already own. You can buy a cheaper arm, as you don't need a nicer expensive one for casual grooming use.
To properly blow dry a bichon, you need a force dryer. You can try to use a human hair dryer, but only one that has a cool setting so you don't burn the dog. The dryer isn't just for drying the coat, it also blows the coat straight.
You will have to buy dog grooming clippers. Clippers usually come with a #10 blade, which is what you use on the sanitary areas. You will have to purchase additional blades for other areas of the body, and if you want the longer lengths, you need a set of attachment combs. Attachment combs are cheaper because they are plastic, but you need to buy a #30 blade to use them, as the blade is how they are put on the clippers. Clipper blades are metal, and can range from just under $20 to nearly $40 for the longer ones.
You will also need a pair of shears as well to do scissor work with. You will need the shears to trim around the edge of the foot and to use on the face, tail, and neaten up other parts of the dog.
The shears, clippers, and blades or combs are going to be the most expensive items, but you need all of them to properly groom your dog.
Don't forget that you will also need ear powder so you can pluck the hair out of the ears and nail clippers and styptic powder in case you cut the quick and the dog bleeds.
Edit: I'm a groomer myself, and have seen some pretty horrendous home grooms. Very few decent ones. If your dog allows you to groom it, and you have the talent, go for it. Make sure you watch plenty of grooming videos, and watch how the groomer holds the tools and how they handle the dog. Some dogs bite their owners when they try to just brush them. Be very careful, because you can cut a dog when you are grooming it.
My husband was the same way about our wedding except that we were engaged in May and married the same year in July. I simple told him that if he didn't help me with the guest list that there would be none of his friends and family there and when they asked why they weren't invited, I would send them his direction. He is pretty afraid of his aunts and doesn't want to upset his grandma so he jumped on it. That was pretty much the only thing (besides getting fitted for his tux) that he contributed to the wedding. I registered with girlfriends and had a way better time that I would have with him. Get a group of girls together and go shopping for everything with them, it's a great excuse for girl time! My father in law and his fiance are getting married this June and it is the same story. I don't think most grooms get very involved in the planning process. I think this is so we are prepared for parenthood. Men propose, we plan. Men have fun, we end up pregnant waking up with a crying infant every two hours. Don't be discouraged, he is a man honey, the sooner you understand what they really means, the less disappointed you will be in everything he doesn't do. lol
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I don't think guys in general care a WHOLE LOT about wedding planning... but it would be nice that he takes more of an interest.
Sit down with him and let him know it's really important. He may feel that you're going crazy with planning though. Have you done something lately that's fun for BOTH of you lately? And that doesn't involve talking about the wedding?
Take a break and do something fun with him... in appreciation for you doing something he enjoys together, he may put in a little more effort.
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From what I hear, most grooms don't care what goes on... As long as you are there on the wedding day standing at the altar, that's all that matters to him.
All the little details the groom can care less about. But, if you want his help with the guest list, demand it from him (which would be my last resort) or just go straight to his parents and collect names. If no one contributes, then do it your way and show him the guest list you made up. Give him a week to look over it, and add whoever it may be that he wants to invite, and if he doesn't, then that will be your guest list :)
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You're going to be married in Spring, 2010?
He's a GUY! He doesn't see the point in planning things this far out. He may be one of those guys who is of the opinion that all he has to do is show up.
It sounds like you're looking for rough numbers:
1. If he has a mother (or mother figure) in the picture, talk to her about how many family members should be invited. If not, talk to his sister and get her assistance.
2. You should know about how many friends he has. Figure that each guy that he bowls or plays golf with will have a wife or SO, so double it.
3. What do you know about people he works with? Ask him about how many people from work he'll need to invite. Again, double that number for wives or SOs.
Once you have some rough numbers, you can start venue shopping and get those places booked.
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Originally Answered: What do I wear to a May wedding?
Before you buy ANYTHING, check with the bride (or someone who has personally spoken with her) to be sure that you don't clash with anything she's already got planned. After that's said and done, take your boyfriend's tie to a nice dress shop and ask an employee if they have anything to match it - try to get the same fabric and color. If you can't find a dress that works, find one made of the same material in either pink or green, but be sure it matches the shade (light/dark) of the orange. As for shoes, find out what some else who is at the wedding is going to be wearing, then decide. I wouldn't suggest super-pointy heels just in case the ground is soggy, but that's your choice to make, not mine. You may also want to consider your height - if you're short, wear something that will make you appear a little taller, and if you're tall, wear something that's not going to make you more than two inches higher off the ground than you already are. Good luck, and I hope you enjoy the wedding!