Should i abort? someon give me advice.?
Topic: What kind of phone case should i get
July 17, 2019 / By Mikayla Question:
I'm 16, and pregnant... the father is denying the child & basicly is a complete asshole like many guys are... I was considering abortion but i dont feel like i have the heart to murder even though i'm going to have to tough **** out and take care of this kid on my own, I dont know how to tell my mother and i might even get kicked out when i do... i'm really confused and scared to go on with the pregnancy.. can someone give me some advice on what i should do? .. i dont work!! and i still havnt finished highschool :((
note: i tried ecstasy before i knew i was pregnant and i'm scared for the health of him/her.
I'm guessing i'm about 3 weeks pregnant because thats when i last had sex.
& it really hurts that this guy thinks that i did this **** on purpose, i dont benefit off of lying and he told me to do abunch of drugs to kill it... this guy is a real asshole and it hurts that i was a complete idiot to beleive anything he said....... abortion is wrong but im just not ready, and its very ****** selfish of me to even consider it but i'm just really scared and worried.
Best Answers: Should i abort? someon give me advice.?
Lexy | 7 days ago
ok... if there is a teen pregnancy health clinic in your area, you should go!
They have social workers there that will help you in so many ways, you have no idea! They will assist you in telling your parents, and financially too.
I definitely think you should finish high school, because that's the basic building block in life.. but your first priority has now become this child.
I know that I could tell you that you shouldn't have had sex without protection, but you already know that now. I hope you learn to do so in the future.
And, #1- stop using any drug you are.. right now. It can affect your baby, although it probably hasn't (if you really have only used once). I work in a rehab unit for teen girls, and we have 3 pregnant ones right now- so don't end up in a place like that... stop on your own if you can.
Please get tested for STDs, if the dad can run around screwing anyone, and denying pregnancy, he probably has something. Just as a precaution, so you don't pass it on to your baby during birth- get tested!
I don't think you should abort. It's my personal advice, but I've heard so many girls who regret it, and it scars them emotionally. So many families are trying to have children of their own and can't.. so please adopt if you know you can't care for it on your own. My neighbor just waited 7 years before she got to adopt.
I think you need to see a doctor, to confirm the pregnancy, and get started on prenatal care (like taking the proper vitamins).
I'll let you know first hand, your mother is going to be pissed, but you have to tell her. She will want to kick you out, but she probably won't. Besides, if you decide to keep the baby- the second she lays eyes on him or her she will fall deeply in love.
I was a teenager when I got pregnant, and my mom was mad.. very mad. It was a rough road for about 5 or 6 months.. then she started to see my tummy show, and kind of get excited. She ended up throwing me 2 big baby showers.
THEN- she wanted to be in the birth room, was a great support system, and fell in love with my son. I know he's #1 in her life, and no one else comes close. But my boyfriend (the baby's dad) has always stuck around, so I don't know that element.. it would be harder without him.
I would suggest you get on WIC (they provide you food- and later on- formula). Get on Medicaid (they will pay for all your medical bills, and the birth- saved me over $10,000!) And get on any other state assisstance you can. (look online for the phone number).
I think, your mom will come around, and with her help, you guys can do it! I know that I love my son more then anything & can't imagine how things would have been if I didn't accidentally get pregnant- but it is a struggle, even with a support system... DEFINITELY GET CHILD SUPPORT from his denying butt!
NOW it sucks, because I'm still young, but I'd love to give my son a baby brother or baby sister (because I don't want my kids too far apart in age) so this is something I didn't think about until recently..
My friend is a really good mom, but she was faced with the same issue as I am now. She didn't want her kids too far apart. She's currently 20 and has 3 kids. She lives on her own and the dad isn't around anymore. It's sad... but it's not always the case that young moms are good moms.
Just do what you feel is right. Don't make any irrational decisions because a LOT will change in your life now that you'll be a mom... you still can adopt the baby out. You will miss out on a lot: graduation, road trips, college...
-I didn't miss out on graduation, but most my friends were able to travel after they graduated and I couldn't. It's not easy to find a babysitter for an entire day, let alone a weekend. Plus I'd miss him too much anyway. I'd advise you not to tell your mom for 2 more weeks.
👍 182 | 👎 7
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Originally Answered: Pls help me abort my 4 mos fetus in my womb. my parents will kill me if they knew it. =(?
the first mistake you made was not using birth control now do not make the second the first thing you should do is speak with your parents and i am sure after the initial dissapointment and most probably anger they will have to accept, your situation, abortion at this stage is not the answer to solve your problem, it will make matters worse, you could continue your education through corrospondence or take a few months break and you could resume it later, your seventeen you will loose a years of education but it could save your life and the life of the child your now carrying, at four months the child is nearly full baby which will move very shortly aborting now will kill the baby and you can loose your own life too, not only that ths may affect your mentally later,
there are many women in the world that are barren and pray for a miracle to have a child you are a lucky woman that had the ability to conceive but you misused that ability by not practising birth control, you can always give the baby up for adoption,remember you are responsible for your own act and you should take the responsibility for it,the first step is tell your mom , remember one mistake does not call for second one.
i pray to god for your safety and for your parents to support you,
Go to the doctor, or the health department and get yourself checked out, to be sure that you are pregnant. At home tests do give false-positives sometimes.
You need to tell your mother, but if you don't think you can, talk to a guidance counselor or one of your close friends' parents. If you think your mother might kick you out, you should have a friend there with you when you tell her. Research homes and shelters in your area. Almost every city has a safe house for young women who are pregnant.
I cannot make this decision for you. I would not abort the baby unless it was going to be a serious hazard to your health. However, it is your right as a woman to make the choice.
Find out what the law is in your state about ages allowed abortions. How old do you have to be to abort without parental consent? How many weeks into the pregnancy can you abort your baby?
PLEASE do not abort the baby after the first trimester! Make a decision quickly...but make a good decision.
Do not end a life because it will make yours a little harder. If there is any possible way you can keep the child, you should attempt. Or give the baby up for adoption.
Good Luck! I wish you the best.
👍 70 | 👎 4
you'll want to tell you mom no matter what... easiest way, write her a letter, let her know how you feel... let all the worries out, tell her everything that you are thinking... then leave the letter for her-- go out and do something that you would normally do... tell her to call you when she is done reading it and wants to talk...
the letter will give both of you a chance to process everything without yelling right away (if anyone even yells) ... I have many friends that had kids while still in HS... and their parents always came around, sometimes it just took some time for them to realize that's still their little girl... and remember the love her no matter what.
As for the abortion, only you know what is right for you. However I would always like to remind you that you can have the baby and find a great family through an open adoption.
Schools will usually try to work with you, but def check with your school before you start showing, so you can make a better decision based on that too...
👍 64 | 👎 1
Please, I beg for you not to have an abortion. Taking an innocent life is the worst thing you could possibly do. I know it can be a most frightening time, but you will be rewarded when you are older. If your mom does kick you out, she has a unbelievably cold heart. Does your school have a babysitting/teen mom program? That would help. Going through life knowing you had an abortion will make you want to cry every second of the day. Go through with the pregnancy, if you do, you will be a true hero in the eyes of your child and in the eyes of me. Having a baby may be the hardest thing you will ever do, but it is also the most amazing experience. Don't give it up. God bless you.
👍 58 | 👎 -2
I understand that you are scared and confused sweetheart, as anyone your age in this situation would be.
Abortion does not only kill an innocent life, but can also tramuatize you physically and emotionally. I have counseled girls in your situation before. Each situation is different.
Some of the results that I have seen from girls/women who have gotten abortions are schizophrenia, bi-polar, severe depression and suicidal tendencies. Those are some of the
Physically, abortion can prevent you from never having children again. During the procedures there have even been incidents where women bleed out, and come close to death.
Yes you are young, but you do have way to get through this. First I would suggest just coming out front and telling your mom what happened. If you are scared to do it alone have a trusted family friend possibly another adult with you for guidance and support. I understand the fear of being kicked out. Something tells me though that it won't happen. Its just this gut feeling I have.
Adoption! If you feel that you are unable to provide for this child than give them to a family who can. More people will respect you for making this choice than for aborting. It will show your maturity level because you are not taking the easy way out. If you want to be apart of the child's life you can ask for an open adoption which allows you rights to see and be apart of his/hers life.
Look into getting a job. Even if its at Wal-Mart or something like that. Does your highschool have a carrer counseling center? If so talk to them. They are an excellent resource. This would also help you save money for your child as well as yourself.
FINISH SCHOOL!! Nowadays, you really can't go anywhere without a high school diploma.
I live in Israel, but if you need to talk or anything PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE to write me. [email protected]
👍 52 | 👎 -5
I had a baby at 16. Today in this society there are so many resources that can help a person out.
First, Your mom may be upset and disappointed at first. But most of all she is your mom and she loves you reguardless. Now before you tell your mom..you should tell her with a plan. I don't know where you live but there are places that have low income houseing....also you can get state help. I would go and get all the help I could. They give food stamps, shelter, money for the baby...it all depends on where you live. Also, there are people who help support us( unwedd mothers). The father, well he doesn't know what he will be missing and by the time he realizes it, it could be too late. You have to do what is best in your heart. You are going to be a mother soon. You are going to have to grow up real fast but you can do it. I did and I was homeless during my prenancy. I am now 25. Talk to as many people as you can and some may be hard on you but others will lend a helping hand.
👍 46 | 👎 -8
Originally Answered: Can anyone give me some advice?
Okay so let me start by prasing you for wanting to help your friend even though you may be jelous of his talents. Personally, I don't think there is anything at all wrong with your friend. In fact, I think his own worries about having something wrong with himself is whats making him seem more socially akward than he truly is. My advice to him is to try and put himself in as much akward situations as possible that way he will learn how to be outgoing, and confident. He also needs to realize how special he is, and praise himself for the greatness he has. I feel that once he becomes more confident, he will in turn, become less akward. And as for a girlfriend, one day a girl will see his special talents and love him for all of them. 21 years has nothing to do with anything, he probably just hasnt found that one special girl (cheesy, but true). Hope I could help<3